Tag Archive | eyesore

Yohji Yamamoto Drop-Rise Jeans

yohji yamamoto front 610

These stunning jeans are available exclusively at Barneys and you can see why.

Where else would you go looking for denim pants in a horrible faded wash that make you look like a hobo who needs a bathroom?

yohji yamamoto rear 610

The rear view is breathtaking, isn’t it? I love that the crotch is so near the ankle.

And the patch pockets are placed so artfully!

For those of you familiar with rise and inseam: 27″ rise, 17″ inseam.

Never argue with Yohji. Just fork over the $610 and never look back.

The Denim Hooded Cape

Denim Hooded Cape - See by Chloe

‘This sharp denim style transforms a wardrobe-staple fabric into a full-on statement garment, by combining light, medium and dark washes in patchwork design.’

Yes, this is a full-on statement but what is the statement? “I have no taste!” Hi, I’m blind!” or just “Please don’t laugh?”

I will admit that this ‘piece’ is versatile. Look at all the ways you can wear it! The arms-out style is my favorite; it’s like something you’d wear during surgery for the amputation.

Denim Hooded Cap rear - See by Chloe

The rear-view is challenging. It suggests a nurse or a member of the clergy, but with something sinister afoot.

Just take it away.

See by Chloe, $465.00

Balmain Brings It

balmain denim suit

I was so taken by this denim Balmain mini skirt, on sale for $1,123, that I nearly had an aneurism when I discovered the matching jacket, reduced from $2,895 to only $1,448.

Imagine the horrified stares if you walked into a room decked out in your distressed embellished Balmain denim mini-suit?

Let me just quote Stylebop:

Under the helm of Olivier Rousteing, heritage It-brand Balmain has been reinvented for the A-list with brash rocker attitude, luxurious fabrics, and rococo embellishments.

Ooh, nailed it!!! Rococo is key. Brash rocker attitude, ditto.

Think of it this way: If you saw this outfit at Walmart for $29.95, would you buy it?

Of course not! But add a couple thousand dollars, and it’s couture. Plus, look at the painstaking workmanship on the skirt.

Balmain denim rear

Calculating the factors of stupidity, hideousness, and price, I’m going to give this effort a solid nine out of ten.

 

Slogan Denim Trousers $275

tigran avetisyan jeans 2

These oversized bleached black denim trousers have a wide leg and an elastic waistband stitched with the enigmatic phrase, “What Will Remain.”

Oh just shut up. They’re also unbelievably stupid from every angle.

Does the fact that the designer, Tigran Avetisyan, is a Russian hipster mitigate the awfulness of these ‘denim trousers?’ Not for me. No pass for Tigran.

If we’re grading strictly on unattractiveness, this is a ten out of ten. The shape, the hem, the stupid waistband slogan, pure eyesore.

But don’t worry, they’re sold out!